Even as I'm writing this, I CANNOT BELIEVE it's true. Yes, we're moving to Utah! If I'm being honest, I couldn't be more excited. Back in April David was accepted into an Assistant Director program that we knew would eventually turn into a Director position with HCA. I could not have DREAMED that a position would actually be open in Utah. Let alone St. Mark's hospital where he worked for years. In my opinion the stars have aligned and we'll be back HOME. Now here's a little bit of bragging about my Mr Wonderful... Not only did St. Mark's hospital want him, but also a hospital in Vegas and a hospital here in Nashville! Talk about a hot commodity. ;)
Now, I'm one to believe that everything happens for a reason. I won't lie when I say that one of my first thoughts were, "Now why did we have to move to Nashville only to stay here a year?" I missed out on A LOT in Utah. Friends and family having babies, getting married, etc. Not to mention the thousands of dollars my family had to spend in flights to see my babies. Flights don't come cheap ya'll!
As I was thinking about this I started realizing just how many people I'm truly going to miss here in Nashville. We've met some LIFELONG friends that I will hold so dear to my heart. Ladies from church who'd come over every week to help with the babies. They saved me from my breaking point. A couple of young women from our church that'd come over after school. One of which I'm stealing and taking with us to California and Utah! ;) Our in home nurse who took such good care of us. (We automatically qualified because of triplets. Y'all are crazy if you think we had the money for an in home nurse. HA!) She'd bring us diapers, formula for little Madelyn, her expert advice and so many laughs. It breaks my heart that we'll be leaving her!! Let's not forget the wonderful nurses and staff at my OB office. With my pregnancy I was in there once a week, sometimes twice a week I swear. I would not have survived my pregnancy without these ladies cheering me on! One nurse in particular was like a second mom to me. She came to our home after the babies were here, let me take a nap. I love naps. :) I will cherish our friendship forever. And the one and only Dr. Martin. Oh my goodness, he has a heart of pure gold. I've never felt more comfortable in someone's care. I honestly felt like I was his only patient, which we all know is not true for an ob! Not to mention he kinda saved my life.
I will be FOREVER grateful for the friendships we've made here in Nashville. We'll be back on day. And if you're ever in Utah, you always have a place to stay.
So, we're really moving to Utah. Anyone want to know when? Well, funny you should ask. David starts the new job December 15th. Moving with triplets sounds like FAR too much work so instead we're flying me and the babies home to Sacramento on December 4th. WHAT?!?! Yeah that's in like 17 days. Yes, I might have a panic attack. Picture us walking through the airport pushing a single stroller, double stroller, carrying 3 car seats and bases, AND luggage for a month. Not to mention getting to the airport at 4am, the almost 7hr flight ahead of us, oh and let's not forget I'll need to pump. So wake up at 2am? ... Then secretively pump on the plane again? Yes, please pray for us.
And that's that. David will be starting his new job, living with a friend, and trying to find us a home. We'll hopefully (assuming we find a place to live) be in Utah County shortly after Christmas.
... That's another thing... Christmas. I was SO looking forward to spending it with David's parents in Missouri! We've had such a fun couple of visits and have truly LOVED having them closer to us. For those of you that don't know, this year they moved from Alaska to Missouri. They have some wonderful property where they're going to building their home. Can't wait for the many memories to come!!!!
Is it too soon to start packing? Maybe I'll just start making lists of everything we'll need to bring...
Monday, November 17, 2014
Thursday, November 13, 2014
happy S I X months little ones
First of all, where has the time gone? There's NO WAY it has been six whole months. This has been the fastest, hardest, most fun 6 months of my life. My eyes still well up with tears at every milestone, every smile, every giggle, every interaction. Y E S they've started interacting with each other, which is the very best. Yesterday they were all laying on the floor with Gavin in the middle. Both of the girls were rolling in towards him. Madelyn starting 'cooing' and Gavin looked right at her while she was talking and got the BIGGEST grin on his face. It was the most adorable thing I've ever seen.
Some of my favorite milestones thus far...
Everyone sleeps 10-12 hours a night... Most nights.
Madelyn has T W O teeth.
Gavin learned how to squeal and scream. He does it all day long.
They LOVE baby Einstein videos. I go to bed with the songs stuck in my head. Every night.
Aurora is the most smiley little girl you'd ever meet.
All of them have the CUTEST little giggles. Ever.
Madelyn finally found her voice and started talking this week. It's the cutest raspy little sound.
They can all roll from tummy to back.
Aurora likes to roll from back to tummy.
They LOVE when their daddy talks to them. The stare at his face so intently.
Madelyn is a total daddy's girl. When he holds her she likes to rub her face on his scruff.
They all are enjoying some solid foods.
They all love to stand and sit up... with some help of course.
Aurora loves to look at herself in the mirror. :)
Gavin loves to hold daddy's hand.
Madelyn is the prima donna. She demands attention.
Gavin is the funny, chill one. He keeps us laughing.
Aurora is so so sweet and cuddly. She's the most even tempered. (Now that she's not colicy! Halelujah!)
Second of all, my heart is literally about to BURST looking at some of their first photos. Please enjoy me reminiscing on their first few photos.
Aurora
Madelyn
Gavin
Looking at these pictures brings back a whirlwind of emotions. (Literally I'm crying as I'm typing this...) I will never ever ever forget being scared to death on the operating table, then the relief as I hear each one of them let out their first cry. I will never forget the overwhelming feeling of love as they hold them up to my face. I will never forget how crushed and sad I was that I couldn't see them for 24 hours after they were born (because of the medication I was on). I kept sending David up to take more pictures. :) I will never forget how determined I was to walk that first night. The pain I felt was immense, but I knew I had to do it in order to go upstairs to see them the next day. I will never forget the relief when I heard that there were no major complications, just a little oxygen, cpap, feeding tube and bili lights. I will never forget the sadness that came over me when they were in their little incubators (that's not what they are, I know) and I wasn't able to pick them up. I remember Maddie was screaming and crying but I couldn't do a dang thing about it. I wasn't allowed to put my hands in there. I will never forget the first time I held each one of them. I never wanted it to end. But unfortunately they could only be out for only 30 - 60 mins a day. Each time I had to lay them back down it broke my heart. I will never forget how frustrating it was dealing with all the chords and beeps 24hrs a day. Haha. I will never forget the first time we were allowed to put real clothes on them... how cute and precious they all looked. I will never forget how excited I was when the nurses FINALLY told me there was a chance they'd be discharged in a few days. The nurses never wanted to say, because they don't want parents to get their hopes up. Everytime we'd ask they'd say "typically they'll be discharged around their due date." (Ya'll they came home 5 weeks before their due date.)
These are just a few moments that I will indeed cherish for the rest of my life. Being a mother is hands down the most incredible feeling in the whole wide world.
Now some pictures to see just how far they've come...
Aurora
Gavin
Madelyn
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
My { w o n d e r f u l } new reality
Today has been a weird morning. David went back to work after having 3 weeks off. Let's talk about that for a second... Who seriously gets to spend 3 SOLID weeks with their significant other? It was exactly what we needed. Laughing, having fun, and enjoying our new family. I've always said David is the best husband ever. (Sorry I'm not sorry if that annoys you.) The past 3 weeks he proved it to me again and again every day. Letting me sleep in. Making me breakfast... and lunch. Telling me to go to Target to take a break. Washing the bottles after every feed. Laundry and dishes. AND (best of all) not playing xbox... AT ALL!!!!! Ha! S E R I O U S L Y , the list goes on and on. I was spoiled rotten. He's the most selfless guy in the world. While he was home we played around with their sleeping schedule a bit. They now are in their cribs from 8pm - 8am! Whether it's sleeping, cooing, or crying they stay put. Some nights I only have to give pacifiers a couple times, other nights it's like every 20 mins for hours and hours. But it's working and they're getting better.
Now to the weird part. Everyone has gone back to work except for me! It's just donning on me that for the first time in oh, forever, I don't have a full time job. I don't have school. I don't work 40+ hours a week in an office that plays the same music over and over and over. I don't have timed lunch break. I don't have to workout in the evenings.... Let's be honest, I am not a morning person. I don't have to get ready if I don't want to. You guys, I am finally doing my dream job. I am a MOM. Yes it's more that 40 hours a week. Yes I now have 3 bosses who are quite demanding. But it's what I've always dreamed of. For years I just wanted to be a mom. I wanted the chaos and demanding schedule. I prayed for the smiles and 'coos'. For some of you, that's probably really lame. For me, I'm finally complete. I'm living the life I've always wanted. This is what I was born to do. Being a mom is my calling in life... Now if only I could talk David into having more. Haha. Kidding... Maybe. :)
Now to the weird part. Everyone has gone back to work except for me! It's just donning on me that for the first time in oh, forever, I don't have a full time job. I don't have school. I don't work 40+ hours a week in an office that plays the same music over and over and over. I don't have timed lunch break. I don't have to workout in the evenings.... Let's be honest, I am not a morning person. I don't have to get ready if I don't want to. You guys, I am finally doing my dream job. I am a MOM. Yes it's more that 40 hours a week. Yes I now have 3 bosses who are quite demanding. But it's what I've always dreamed of. For years I just wanted to be a mom. I wanted the chaos and demanding schedule. I prayed for the smiles and 'coos'. For some of you, that's probably really lame. For me, I'm finally complete. I'm living the life I've always wanted. This is what I was born to do. Being a mom is my calling in life... Now if only I could talk David into having more. Haha. Kidding... Maybe. :)
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Hospital Photos
I seriously cannot say enough wonderful things about our photographer. I'm telling you, she's incredible!! Photography by Sarah Clark :)
http://photographybysarahclark.com/blog/
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http://photographybysarahclark.com/blog/
Aurora Leigh
Gavin David
Madelyn Mae
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
"I'm living with nodes, but I'm a survivor."
"I'm living with nodes, but I'm a survivor." Thanks for that Pitch Perfect.
Remember that one time I almost bled to death. Well I had a ct scan while I was in the hospital and it just happened to catch my thyroid. One side of my thyroid was significantly larger than the other and I needed to have an ultrasound done on it. Turns out I have 4 nodes on my thyroid. Today I'm back in the hospital (man I hate this place) getting a biopsy done on them. My doctor said that I shouldn't worry at all. Supposedly thyroid nodes are very common among adults and 95% of the time they aren't cancerous.
So why am I all the sudden worried? Gah! It's because I'm a mom now. I have people that depend on me. And maybe I'm a little hormonal because my body is still adjusting. Hello, I did just give birth to three babies. My body is a little out of whack. Plus the last two months I haven't had the best track record with hospitals. So I'm letting myself be a little emotional. I'm writing this as I'm sitting at the hospital waiting to get called back... Thinking of my dear sweet babies at home with nana. I'm sure just as the doctor said, everything will be fine... It's nothing to worry about.
Just breath Allyson. Everything will be fine.
Update: The nodes are non-cancerous. :)
Remember that one time I almost bled to death. Well I had a ct scan while I was in the hospital and it just happened to catch my thyroid. One side of my thyroid was significantly larger than the other and I needed to have an ultrasound done on it. Turns out I have 4 nodes on my thyroid. Today I'm back in the hospital (man I hate this place) getting a biopsy done on them. My doctor said that I shouldn't worry at all. Supposedly thyroid nodes are very common among adults and 95% of the time they aren't cancerous.
So why am I all the sudden worried? Gah! It's because I'm a mom now. I have people that depend on me. And maybe I'm a little hormonal because my body is still adjusting. Hello, I did just give birth to three babies. My body is a little out of whack. Plus the last two months I haven't had the best track record with hospitals. So I'm letting myself be a little emotional. I'm writing this as I'm sitting at the hospital waiting to get called back... Thinking of my dear sweet babies at home with nana. I'm sure just as the doctor said, everything will be fine... It's nothing to worry about.
Just breath Allyson. Everything will be fine.
Update: The nodes are non-cancerous. :)
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Happy 1 month my angels!
I cannot believe my babies are one month old!! They are all home and happy as ever. Right now we're on a 3 hour feeding schedule. I get up to pump 30 mins before they eat. Unfortunately since they're premies they don't latch very well for breastfeeding. So they're bottle fed my milk until we get breastfeeding down. To be honest, I'm not 100% positive that I want to exclusively breastfeed. Yeah sure pumping isn't the greatest thing in the whole wide world, but at least people can help bottle feed them! So we'll see what we end up doing long term. My goal is to pump/breastfeed for 1 year... So far I'm one month down! Wooohoo! Haha.
Can I just say that my mom is a SAINT! Oh my goodness, we are so so lucky to have her here helping us. She's a HUGE help! Right now the routine is I do all of the night feedings while she sleeps, then I wake her up at 8am while I sleep for a few hours. I'm so so lucky that she's going to be here until mid August. Hopefully we can get them on a little longer sleeping schedule by then. Because eating every 3 hours only leaves about an hour - an hour and a half of sleep/down time in between... Especially with me pumping 30 mins prior. I'll tell you what though, it's totally worth it. Yes, you can survive on pure adrenaline. I did for 5 days before my mom got here! Maybe got 3 hours of sleep total per day. Motherhood is the greatest thing in the whole wide world.
One month stats... Aurora weighs 5 pounds 4 ounces (born at 3 pounds 12 ounces)!! Gavin weighs 6 pounds 3 ounces (born at 4 pounds 6 ounces)!! Madelyn weighs 5 pounds 2 ounces (born at 4 pounds 2 ounces)!!
These are the photos I took on their actually 1 month. I thought before the feeding would be best that way they're awake. HA - think again. Three hungry fussy babies is what I got.
The next day I tried again. This time it was after the feeding. Much happier babies!
Can I just say that my mom is a SAINT! Oh my goodness, we are so so lucky to have her here helping us. She's a HUGE help! Right now the routine is I do all of the night feedings while she sleeps, then I wake her up at 8am while I sleep for a few hours. I'm so so lucky that she's going to be here until mid August. Hopefully we can get them on a little longer sleeping schedule by then. Because eating every 3 hours only leaves about an hour - an hour and a half of sleep/down time in between... Especially with me pumping 30 mins prior. I'll tell you what though, it's totally worth it. Yes, you can survive on pure adrenaline. I did for 5 days before my mom got here! Maybe got 3 hours of sleep total per day. Motherhood is the greatest thing in the whole wide world.
One month stats... Aurora weighs 5 pounds 4 ounces (born at 3 pounds 12 ounces)!! Gavin weighs 6 pounds 3 ounces (born at 4 pounds 6 ounces)!! Madelyn weighs 5 pounds 2 ounces (born at 4 pounds 2 ounces)!!
These are the photos I took on their actually 1 month. I thought before the feeding would be best that way they're awake. HA - think again. Three hungry fussy babies is what I got.
Gavin trying to eat Aurora's head
HA - it just makes me laugh
The next day I tried again. This time it was after the feeding. Much happier babies!
Aurora
Gavin
Madelyn
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
We're HOME!!!
I am such a happy momma! Everyone is home and happy! Gavin and Aurora got to come home on Saturday. Madelyn came home Monday. So my babies that were born at 31 weeks spent 25, 25, and 27 days in the NICU. I find this quite incredible. They all came home before they were 36 weeks. I can attest to you that prayers were answered. My whole entire pregnancy I prayed for healthy babies with a short NICU stay. I couldn't have asked for healthier babies.
Last group picture all together before we took Gavin and Aurora home!
(Madelyn, Gavin, Aurora)
Aurora giving Madelyn a pep-talk to get her home soon!
Gavin & Aurora... Ps these two were head to head in my belly.
I think it's quite funny they're coming home together!
We're all home and HAPPY!!!
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
Week 2 and 3 baby stats!
Week 2
Gavin weighs 4.14 and is in an open crib! This means that he's able to regulate his own body temperature on his own without losing weight. You burn more calories when you're cold so it's very important for babies to keep gaining weight while trying to stay warm. He's doing a fantastic job!
Madelyn weighs 4.5 and is doing wonderful. They are weaning her to an open crib by slowly turning down the heat in her bed. So far she's doing a great job. Hopefully within the next couple days she'll join her brother in a big girl crib!
Aurora weighs 4.2 and is trying to catch up to her brother and sister. She's our tiny one who was smashed underneath her brother and sister while they took all the food. So she needs to gain some weight before she can try to regulate her own temperature. She's doing amazing though!
All three babies are completely off oxygen and just have their feeding tubes. They're getting the breast milk that I pump in their tubes and love it. :) We also started bottle feeds this week. Bottle feeds start out super slow. Babies don't know how to coordinate breath, suck, and swallow until 34 weeks. The day they turned 34 weeks we hit the ground running. They start out at one bottle a day that they have to finish in 30 mins. Once they finish one bottle a day they move to two bottles a day... etc. None of the babies finished their bottles the first couple days, but they have the technique down. It just wears them out and they end up falling asleep. Everyday they're getting a little stronger and drinking a little more!
So proud of our little ones. They're doing so great! We couldn't have dreamed of more healthy, happy babies.
Week 3
Everyone is in an open crib!! Happy day!
Gavin weighs 5.5, Madelyn weighs 4.10, and Aurora weighs 4.8!
Little Miss Aurora has surprised us all and is taking her bottle feeds like a CHAMP! She's up to all bottle feeds now. So exciting! Gavin is up to 6 bottles a day and is right behind her. Our little Madelyn is struggling and isn't as coordinated as her brother and sister. (Sorry girl, you probably got that from me!) She is still at one bottle a day because she isn't finishing them. Hopefully she'll start improving.
What's next? Aurora just needs to keep gaining weight as she's on all bottles. Again, it takes a lot of work out of them so they can't be burning too many calories. After she proves she can handle it then she gets to come home. Before they come home they need to pass the car seat test. Their heart rate and oxygen cannot drop while in the car seat... We'll see if they can do it. Hopefully Aurora and Gavin will be coming home in just a week or so!
Their first bottles...
Gavin weighs 4.14 and is in an open crib! This means that he's able to regulate his own body temperature on his own without losing weight. You burn more calories when you're cold so it's very important for babies to keep gaining weight while trying to stay warm. He's doing a fantastic job!
My handsome little man!
Madelyn weighs 4.5 and is doing wonderful. They are weaning her to an open crib by slowly turning down the heat in her bed. So far she's doing a great job. Hopefully within the next couple days she'll join her brother in a big girl crib!
Sweet little Madelyn!
Aurora weighs 4.2 and is trying to catch up to her brother and sister. She's our tiny one who was smashed underneath her brother and sister while they took all the food. So she needs to gain some weight before she can try to regulate her own temperature. She's doing amazing though!
Adorable little Aurora!
All three babies are completely off oxygen and just have their feeding tubes. They're getting the breast milk that I pump in their tubes and love it. :) We also started bottle feeds this week. Bottle feeds start out super slow. Babies don't know how to coordinate breath, suck, and swallow until 34 weeks. The day they turned 34 weeks we hit the ground running. They start out at one bottle a day that they have to finish in 30 mins. Once they finish one bottle a day they move to two bottles a day... etc. None of the babies finished their bottles the first couple days, but they have the technique down. It just wears them out and they end up falling asleep. Everyday they're getting a little stronger and drinking a little more!
So proud of our little ones. They're doing so great! We couldn't have dreamed of more healthy, happy babies.
Week 3
Everyone is in an open crib!! Happy day!
Gavin weighs 5.5, Madelyn weighs 4.10, and Aurora weighs 4.8!
Little Miss Aurora has surprised us all and is taking her bottle feeds like a CHAMP! She's up to all bottle feeds now. So exciting! Gavin is up to 6 bottles a day and is right behind her. Our little Madelyn is struggling and isn't as coordinated as her brother and sister. (Sorry girl, you probably got that from me!) She is still at one bottle a day because she isn't finishing them. Hopefully she'll start improving.
What's next? Aurora just needs to keep gaining weight as she's on all bottles. Again, it takes a lot of work out of them so they can't be burning too many calories. After she proves she can handle it then she gets to come home. Before they come home they need to pass the car seat test. Their heart rate and oxygen cannot drop while in the car seat... We'll see if they can do it. Hopefully Aurora and Gavin will be coming home in just a week or so!
Their first bottles...
Aurora
Gavin
Madelyn
Sunday, May 25, 2014
"We almost lost you..."
"We almost lost you..." Those four words are still piercing my heart and brings tears to my eyes.
Warning - this post is going to be a little graphic!
Wednesday started out like any other day. I woke up to pump then had some sunnyside up eggs and toast for breakfast. As I was sitting at the table I noticed I still had a headache from the day before. Before I was discharged from the hospital on Monday, my doctor was going back and forth between putting me on some blood pressure medicine. My blood pressure was all over the place during the pregnancy and the days after as well. He decided not to, but he wanted me to come in if I had a headache that wouldn't go away. So this was day 2 of my headache. Honestly I have a pretty high pain tolerance (12 broken bones over the years). So I usually would have thought nothing of it, but something was telling me to call my doctor. I called the office and let them know I was on day 2 of my headache. They told me to come in right away. My mom and I threw on some clothes and we were on our way.
Once I got to the doctors office I had to go to the bathroom. When I went to wipe I noticed my bleeding increased a ton. In the days prior I was hardly bleeding at all. I didn't think anything of it though, flushed the toilet and went back to the waiting room. I was called back and my mom just stayed seated. I turned to her and said, "I think I want you in there."
We got to the room and the nurse took my blood pressure. 180/117 - HOLY SMOKES!!!!!!!!! Although it's never been that high, I knew the drill... lay back on my left side for 5 minutes then they'll retest. As I got off the bed to adjust and lay down I felt a HUGE gush of blood. I turned to the nurse and said "Well that's weird. I haven't bled hardly at all the past 2 days and now I'm bleeding like crazy!" She helped me lay down then said "Oh sweetie you're already bleeding through your pants - let's go to the bathroom to clean up." I went to the bathroom and cleaned up a bit. The only thing I could think of was "SERIOUSLY!?!? I don't have anything to tie around my waist to walk out of here! How embarrassing!!"
The doctor came in the room and said to me - "WOW you look amazing. You even had time to put some make up on!" I laughed because I had absolutely zero make up on, but I could feel my cheeks flushed like I was running a temperature. I told him this and they took my temperature... It was 99.8. No big deal to them, but I know that I always run around 97. The doctor then had me sit down on the table. He said "Yes your blood pressure is high, but I'm more worried about the all the sudden bleeding. So I'm going to need to do an exam." I laid back on the table as he checked my cervix and started pressing on my lower abdomen. He then said "WOW. You are completely backed up and I'm going to need to press on your stomach/uterus to get all of this out." I looked at my mom in complete terror and she came over and held my hand.
For those of you who've had a c-section you'll know exactly what I'm talking about with these tummy massages. They're EXTREMELY PAINFUL. Imagine a male doctor, not a nice female nurse doing it, with all of his strength!
I SCREAMED at the top of my lungs. Well that was awkward. I wonder what all of the other patients in this office are thinking now. I looked up at my mom and she was crying seeing me in so much pain.
The doctor then decided to do an ultrasound to see how much blood and clots were left in my uterus after the massage. Unfortunately there were still a ton. My doctor turned to me and said, I'm going to let you push on your stomach to see what you can get out, but I'll be back in 20 minutes to do some more pushing myself.
I laid there in pain. Unfortunately now that my uterus was getting cleared out, it was starting to cramp and do it's job. Yeah for doing it's job, but oh my... I thought I was going to pass out because of the pain. It was like my miscarriage cramps times 100!! And I'm supposed to be pushing on my stomach which was recently tore open and stitched back up? Okay. So I start slowly pushing on my stomach. My uterus is completely hard and I can feel exactly where I need to push along the edge. I give it a couple good pushes and PLOP. I turned to my mom with my eyes wide open and said "what was that?" I pushed out a clot that was literally the size of a babies head. She immediately called the nurse into the room to clean up a bit. Wow I'm so embarrassed of the freaking mess I'm making!!! I just kept apologizing over and over. I was mortified.
The doctor came back in 20 minutes later as he said. I turned to the nurse and asked for a clean towel rolled up that I could bite on. I wasn't about to scream like that again. My doctor checked my cervix and he could feel the clots already. I took a deep breath in as he put his hand on my lower abdomen to start pushing. I looked up at my mom, completely terrified already beginning to cry. Thankfully this time no one could hear the screams because of the towel stuffed in my mouth. I looked at my mom again and she was just sobbing then leaned over to give me a hug. The doctor did another ultrasound to see how much he got out.
"I'm concerned about how fast your uterus is refilling with blood and clots. I think we need to call an ambulance and get you to the hospital. I'll call for the ambulance, but I need to do one last massage before they load you up."
I turned to my mom and said okay mom, you gotta go home and get me and change of pants and my wallet that has my insurance card. Meet me back here, the doctor will do the massage and then we'll go to the hospital.
My mom came back with the items, one last massage, and then I was getting loaded onto the stretcher. I cannot tell you how happy I was knowing that was my last massage without pain meds. As soon as we got to the hospital my plan was to get loaded up with drugs. I'm done being in this much pain. Hands down, most painful and terrifying experience.
I called my husband and let him know that I was being taken to the hospital and that he needed to meet me there. I needed his strength and comfort more that anything!!
We all get to the hospital, me by ambulance, my mom followed in my car, and David left work to join us. The nurse did some light pushing on my stomach, gave me pain meds, and told me the doctor would be in to see me shortly. The doctor came in and accessed me. He said I have an infection and we need to do an emergency D&C (where they go in and scrape the uterus) which will only take 30 minutes. My doctor would be here at 4:30pm to get started.
At 4:00 pm we said our goodbyes. As I was being wheeled away my last words to both my mom and husband were "I love you! I'll see you in 30 minutes!" I choked back tears through the pain. I could not WAIT to get some anesthesia because these pain pills were not touching the pain!
My doctor walked into the operating room and I instantly felt better. I have the most amazing doctor ever!! Yes he just completely beat me up this morning, but he is truly one of the kindest and caring men I know. I loved that I finally could see a familiar face among all the other doctors and nurses. They started the anesthesia and told me to breath through my nose and our through my mouth. That's the last thing I remember.
The next thing I knew I was being woken up by nurses in my face telling me to breath. "Breath Allyson. You need to breath." I started breathing. Wow. I feel like a truck just hit me. I am sore ALL OVER.
They wheeled me back to my room and we meet David in the hall! BABE!!! He held my hand and said "You were just sick of all our kids getting all of the attention weren't you?" In the room they started hooking me up to machines to check my vitals. I looked up at the clock... 8:50pm.
"David how is it 8:50pm? It was supposed to be 30 minutes!!!"
"Well you gave us all a really big scare hunny."
My mom and David were kinda scarce on the details at first. Over the next couple days they all started to come out though. I think they were just still in shock and didn't want anything to relapse. I had absolutely no signs leading up to today, who's to say it's not going to happen again? My doctor said he's NEVER seen anyone look so healthy with so many complications going on. He also said in his 15 years he's never seen that many clots and that large of clots. Ever.
While I was under anesthesia, my bleeding was out of control. My doctor couldn't get it to stop. He went out to the waiting room to talk to my mom and David. He said "We can't get her bleeding to stop. We're going to need to keep her sedated for 24 hours in the ICU. We're going to have to do an emergency hysterectomy tomorrow. We're just not sure what's going to happen."
My mom and David left the hospital to go home to get the essentials... Phone chargers and tooth brushes. They were both completely in shock. My mom was sobbing uncontrollably and calling every family member. David, who I have never seen cry, was once again a rock. He said he was close to tears, but needed to stay strong for my mom.
As soon as they got home they got a phone call from my doctor. "Somehow her bleeding stopped. We're going to go ahead and wake her."
There are miracles that happened on Wednesday that I am so grateful for. 1. I went to the doctor for a freaking headache!!... If all this happened while I was at home, I would have freaked out. I was in the care of my physician and I knew they'd take care of me. 2. If I would have been on blood pressure medicine, I would have no doubt bled to death. 3. I'm just beyond grateful that it wasn't my time to go. They were able to control the bleeding finally. I'm still here and going to raise these beautiful babies with my wonderful husband.
It's so surreal to have doctors and nurse say to you "we almost lost you!" or "I heard you almost died?" I LOVE the nurses I had after my c section and thankfully was put on the same floor with the same group after this craziness. So a lot of them saw my name come up and would come see me to check on me. So grateful for these wonderful ladies!!
This experience has truly strengthened my testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I'm so grateful for the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. There are no coincidences. My doctor was prompted to not give me blood pressure medicine before I was discharged from delivery and I was prompted to call my doctor for a headache. These two are both undeniable! I'm grateful for my knowledge of the atonement of Jesus Christ. He suffered every pain and affliction as he was nailed to the cross. He knows EXACTLY what I was going through. He knows the pain that I went through. He knows how scared I was. He knows how scared I still am. HE KNOWS. I'm grateful that my family is eternal. We were sealed in the temple for time and all eternity. Because of this, I know that if something does happen I will see them again. I'm grateful for all of the prayers said on my behalf. I know the power of prayer. It has helped to heal and strengthen me during this time that I've needed it the most.
To my friends and family - I cannot thank you enough for all of the texts, phone calls, Facebook messages etc. You all have no idea how much I needed to hear your sweet words of comfort and concern. To my wonderful husband who won't let me out of his sight these days - I love you more than you'll ever know. Thank you for being my rock and my better half.
3 blood transfusions, a re-stitched c section incision (thanks doc for the "massages" that busted it open again), and many prayers later - I'm on the road to recovery once again.
Warning - this post is going to be a little graphic!
Wednesday started out like any other day. I woke up to pump then had some sunnyside up eggs and toast for breakfast. As I was sitting at the table I noticed I still had a headache from the day before. Before I was discharged from the hospital on Monday, my doctor was going back and forth between putting me on some blood pressure medicine. My blood pressure was all over the place during the pregnancy and the days after as well. He decided not to, but he wanted me to come in if I had a headache that wouldn't go away. So this was day 2 of my headache. Honestly I have a pretty high pain tolerance (12 broken bones over the years). So I usually would have thought nothing of it, but something was telling me to call my doctor. I called the office and let them know I was on day 2 of my headache. They told me to come in right away. My mom and I threw on some clothes and we were on our way.
Once I got to the doctors office I had to go to the bathroom. When I went to wipe I noticed my bleeding increased a ton. In the days prior I was hardly bleeding at all. I didn't think anything of it though, flushed the toilet and went back to the waiting room. I was called back and my mom just stayed seated. I turned to her and said, "I think I want you in there."
We got to the room and the nurse took my blood pressure. 180/117 - HOLY SMOKES!!!!!!!!! Although it's never been that high, I knew the drill... lay back on my left side for 5 minutes then they'll retest. As I got off the bed to adjust and lay down I felt a HUGE gush of blood. I turned to the nurse and said "Well that's weird. I haven't bled hardly at all the past 2 days and now I'm bleeding like crazy!" She helped me lay down then said "Oh sweetie you're already bleeding through your pants - let's go to the bathroom to clean up." I went to the bathroom and cleaned up a bit. The only thing I could think of was "SERIOUSLY!?!? I don't have anything to tie around my waist to walk out of here! How embarrassing!!"
The doctor came in the room and said to me - "WOW you look amazing. You even had time to put some make up on!" I laughed because I had absolutely zero make up on, but I could feel my cheeks flushed like I was running a temperature. I told him this and they took my temperature... It was 99.8. No big deal to them, but I know that I always run around 97. The doctor then had me sit down on the table. He said "Yes your blood pressure is high, but I'm more worried about the all the sudden bleeding. So I'm going to need to do an exam." I laid back on the table as he checked my cervix and started pressing on my lower abdomen. He then said "WOW. You are completely backed up and I'm going to need to press on your stomach/uterus to get all of this out." I looked at my mom in complete terror and she came over and held my hand.
For those of you who've had a c-section you'll know exactly what I'm talking about with these tummy massages. They're EXTREMELY PAINFUL. Imagine a male doctor, not a nice female nurse doing it, with all of his strength!
I SCREAMED at the top of my lungs. Well that was awkward. I wonder what all of the other patients in this office are thinking now. I looked up at my mom and she was crying seeing me in so much pain.
The doctor then decided to do an ultrasound to see how much blood and clots were left in my uterus after the massage. Unfortunately there were still a ton. My doctor turned to me and said, I'm going to let you push on your stomach to see what you can get out, but I'll be back in 20 minutes to do some more pushing myself.
I laid there in pain. Unfortunately now that my uterus was getting cleared out, it was starting to cramp and do it's job. Yeah for doing it's job, but oh my... I thought I was going to pass out because of the pain. It was like my miscarriage cramps times 100!! And I'm supposed to be pushing on my stomach which was recently tore open and stitched back up? Okay. So I start slowly pushing on my stomach. My uterus is completely hard and I can feel exactly where I need to push along the edge. I give it a couple good pushes and PLOP. I turned to my mom with my eyes wide open and said "what was that?" I pushed out a clot that was literally the size of a babies head. She immediately called the nurse into the room to clean up a bit. Wow I'm so embarrassed of the freaking mess I'm making!!! I just kept apologizing over and over. I was mortified.
The doctor came back in 20 minutes later as he said. I turned to the nurse and asked for a clean towel rolled up that I could bite on. I wasn't about to scream like that again. My doctor checked my cervix and he could feel the clots already. I took a deep breath in as he put his hand on my lower abdomen to start pushing. I looked up at my mom, completely terrified already beginning to cry. Thankfully this time no one could hear the screams because of the towel stuffed in my mouth. I looked at my mom again and she was just sobbing then leaned over to give me a hug. The doctor did another ultrasound to see how much he got out.
"I'm concerned about how fast your uterus is refilling with blood and clots. I think we need to call an ambulance and get you to the hospital. I'll call for the ambulance, but I need to do one last massage before they load you up."
I turned to my mom and said okay mom, you gotta go home and get me and change of pants and my wallet that has my insurance card. Meet me back here, the doctor will do the massage and then we'll go to the hospital.
My mom came back with the items, one last massage, and then I was getting loaded onto the stretcher. I cannot tell you how happy I was knowing that was my last massage without pain meds. As soon as we got to the hospital my plan was to get loaded up with drugs. I'm done being in this much pain. Hands down, most painful and terrifying experience.
I called my husband and let him know that I was being taken to the hospital and that he needed to meet me there. I needed his strength and comfort more that anything!!
We all get to the hospital, me by ambulance, my mom followed in my car, and David left work to join us. The nurse did some light pushing on my stomach, gave me pain meds, and told me the doctor would be in to see me shortly. The doctor came in and accessed me. He said I have an infection and we need to do an emergency D&C (where they go in and scrape the uterus) which will only take 30 minutes. My doctor would be here at 4:30pm to get started.
At 4:00 pm we said our goodbyes. As I was being wheeled away my last words to both my mom and husband were "I love you! I'll see you in 30 minutes!" I choked back tears through the pain. I could not WAIT to get some anesthesia because these pain pills were not touching the pain!
My doctor walked into the operating room and I instantly felt better. I have the most amazing doctor ever!! Yes he just completely beat me up this morning, but he is truly one of the kindest and caring men I know. I loved that I finally could see a familiar face among all the other doctors and nurses. They started the anesthesia and told me to breath through my nose and our through my mouth. That's the last thing I remember.
The next thing I knew I was being woken up by nurses in my face telling me to breath. "Breath Allyson. You need to breath." I started breathing. Wow. I feel like a truck just hit me. I am sore ALL OVER.
They wheeled me back to my room and we meet David in the hall! BABE!!! He held my hand and said "You were just sick of all our kids getting all of the attention weren't you?" In the room they started hooking me up to machines to check my vitals. I looked up at the clock... 8:50pm.
"David how is it 8:50pm? It was supposed to be 30 minutes!!!"
"Well you gave us all a really big scare hunny."
My mom and David were kinda scarce on the details at first. Over the next couple days they all started to come out though. I think they were just still in shock and didn't want anything to relapse. I had absolutely no signs leading up to today, who's to say it's not going to happen again? My doctor said he's NEVER seen anyone look so healthy with so many complications going on. He also said in his 15 years he's never seen that many clots and that large of clots. Ever.
While I was under anesthesia, my bleeding was out of control. My doctor couldn't get it to stop. He went out to the waiting room to talk to my mom and David. He said "We can't get her bleeding to stop. We're going to need to keep her sedated for 24 hours in the ICU. We're going to have to do an emergency hysterectomy tomorrow. We're just not sure what's going to happen."
My mom and David left the hospital to go home to get the essentials... Phone chargers and tooth brushes. They were both completely in shock. My mom was sobbing uncontrollably and calling every family member. David, who I have never seen cry, was once again a rock. He said he was close to tears, but needed to stay strong for my mom.
As soon as they got home they got a phone call from my doctor. "Somehow her bleeding stopped. We're going to go ahead and wake her."
There are miracles that happened on Wednesday that I am so grateful for. 1. I went to the doctor for a freaking headache!!... If all this happened while I was at home, I would have freaked out. I was in the care of my physician and I knew they'd take care of me. 2. If I would have been on blood pressure medicine, I would have no doubt bled to death. 3. I'm just beyond grateful that it wasn't my time to go. They were able to control the bleeding finally. I'm still here and going to raise these beautiful babies with my wonderful husband.
It's so surreal to have doctors and nurse say to you "we almost lost you!" or "I heard you almost died?" I LOVE the nurses I had after my c section and thankfully was put on the same floor with the same group after this craziness. So a lot of them saw my name come up and would come see me to check on me. So grateful for these wonderful ladies!!
This experience has truly strengthened my testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I'm so grateful for the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. There are no coincidences. My doctor was prompted to not give me blood pressure medicine before I was discharged from delivery and I was prompted to call my doctor for a headache. These two are both undeniable! I'm grateful for my knowledge of the atonement of Jesus Christ. He suffered every pain and affliction as he was nailed to the cross. He knows EXACTLY what I was going through. He knows the pain that I went through. He knows how scared I was. He knows how scared I still am. HE KNOWS. I'm grateful that my family is eternal. We were sealed in the temple for time and all eternity. Because of this, I know that if something does happen I will see them again. I'm grateful for all of the prayers said on my behalf. I know the power of prayer. It has helped to heal and strengthen me during this time that I've needed it the most.
To my friends and family - I cannot thank you enough for all of the texts, phone calls, Facebook messages etc. You all have no idea how much I needed to hear your sweet words of comfort and concern. To my wonderful husband who won't let me out of his sight these days - I love you more than you'll ever know. Thank you for being my rock and my better half.
3 blood transfusions, a re-stitched c section incision (thanks doc for the "massages" that busted it open again), and many prayers later - I'm on the road to recovery once again.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Happy one week my angels
I am so proud of my angel babies. They are doing so well!! Shocking the doctors with their progress and making the nurses earn their money! :)
So I guess for only being 31.5 weeks gestation, my babies are huge and doing INCREDIBLE. I will say, through the whole pregnancy we've prayed for a short NICU time. I knew from day 1 that the chances of them spending some time in the NICU were pretty high. Unless I made it to 36 weeks, it's pretty much a given.
All of the kiddos are still in the NICU (keep in mind they're only 32 weeks along). The doctors say typically they'll be discharged somewhere around their due date, July 10th. Do I think they'll be in there that long? Absolutely not! But I won't tell you my guess as I don't want to jinx it. I was discharged from the hospital yesterday and literally cried the entire way home and all night. I know my babies are in great hands, but it killed me that I was leaving them. I'd give anything to sleep in a cot next to their beds, watching them all night! It's going to be a rough couple months without them home.
I"ll start with Aurora's one week progress.
Aurora Leigh
Little Miss Aurora - the tiny one out of the bunch. She started out last week on CPAP, bili lights, only IV nutrition, caffeine, and a heart murmur. She's my little fighter though. She had brother and sister on top of her in the womb so she's going to be our tough cookie. Today she's on a small amount of oxygen, caffeine and increasing her feedings everyday. She is still getting food from her IV, but has momma's milk along with it.
Gavin David
Our handsome Gavin - who stole momma's heart. He started out last week on CPAP, bili lights, caffeine and only IV nutrition. Sound familiar? Yeah, he and Ari were often head to head in my belly. It's no surprise that they're progressing at the same rate. Today he's on a small amount of oxygen, caffeine and increasing his feedings everyday. He still has an IV for food, but momma's milk is definitely his favorite.
Madelyn Mae
Little miss Madelyn - the overachiever. Madelyn came out of the womb in a race to come home. Unlike her brother and sister, she's only needed oxygen, bili lights, caffeine and IV nutrition. Today she made her momma and daddy so proud as she got her IV out. She eats momma's milk only now! Today the only thing that Maddie is still on is the caffeine. The nurses said today that she'll be in an open crib in no time!
So when can they come home? They need to be over 4.5 pounds, be able to regulate their body temperature, no episodes for 5 days, and take a bottle. Unfortunately they don't introduce bottles until 34 weeks gestation (next Thursday May 29th)... yes I'm counting down the days. As for gaining weight, it's important that they don't lose weight once they're in an open crib. You burn more calories when you're cold, so we gotta make sure they're still gaining. The reason the babies are on caffeine is because sometimes they forget to breath. They call these "episodes" where their heart rate will drop below 80. Sometimes the nurses have to intervene and put their hand on their back or nudge them. Other times the babies will just start breathing on their own. Madelyn has had 5 episodes but nurses only had to intervene once. Since she was having episodes they automatically put Gavin and Aurora on caffeine as well. Episodes are super common in preemies... They grow out of them as they get older.
More good news... we were told our crew will probably be moved to a different section of the NICU. The section they're in now is for babies that need acute care. Our fabulous trio doesn't need to be watched 24/7. We wake them every 3 hours for feeding, diaper change, temperature check, and once a day they're weighed. They have all sorts of sensors on them that beep when their heart rate and oxygen get below a certain point, but they're doing so great!! Our nurses are so amazed at how interactive our trio our. Usually at this gestation they're pretty mellow and sleep 24/7. Our bunch is quite the squirmy crew and HATE all of the wires hooked up to them. Can't tell you how many times they've pulled out their feeding tubes, eye masks, and oxygen out of their nose. They're just ready to get rid of it all. :)
To those momma's who get to hold and snuggle their newborns 24/7 - I envy you! I know our time will come but man is it HARD. My first day up in the NICU our Maddie was crying in her isolate and I just cried with her. It killed me that I wasn't able to pick her up and make everything better. We're allowed to take the babies out once a day for 30 minutes if they're swaddled or 1hr if I'm doing skin to skin. As of today, they've officially all been held by mommy and daddy. When they were first born they had their IV's hooked up to the veins in their umbilical chord and we weren't able to hold them at all. I got to hold Maddie last Thursday, Gavin this past Saturday, and Aurora just today.
I cannot thank you ALL for your prayers and positive thoughts. These babies are truly doing AMAZING!!!!
Now for some pictures...
Gavin suntanning under the bili lights
Daddy and Aurora - he's smitten!
Madelyn and Grandma
Mr. Gavin snoozing
My absolute favorite picture of Madelyn. :)
Aurora - mid yawn... Ooh my heart!
Delivery Day!
On Monday May 12th I went to the doctor for a regular appointment and ended up in the hospital. My doctor didn't like that my blood pressure was really high and I had a bad headache... All signs of pre-eclampsia. He told me to go to the hospital and don't plan on leaving without delivering the babies. I called David and told him to meet me at home, I had to pack my hospital bag still!
Once we got to the hospital the blood tests started and a 24 hr urine collection. They said they'd wait until they got the results of the blood test and urine to make any decisions. 24 hour urine started at like 2pm and they told me they probably wouldn't get the results until Tuesday evening, then they'd make a decision.
Through the night Monday my blood pressure continued to rise and my headache got worse. Tuesday morning around 10am my doctor came in and said he didn't want to wait for the urine collection, instead plan on a c-section at 2pm. I immediately called David freaking out telling him to leave work and get here.... NOW!
You have NO IDEA how nervous I was about having a c-section. I was absolutely completely terrified. I thought for sure I was going to lose too much blood and die.... That or the epidural was going to paralyze me. The thought of getting the epidural to numb me, pretty much sent me into an anxiety attack.
As I laid on the hospital bed being pushed through the halls headed towards the operating room, it was like I was in a different world. David was holding my hand and my body was shaking profusely! David didn't initially go in the operating room with me. He made a stop to put on his scrubs. I was NOT HAPPY that he wasn't there as they were numbing me. I was sitting on the edge of the operating table, leaning on the nurse and really could have used his hand to hold. They laid me back on the table and David walked in... THANK GOODNESS!!!!!
Laying on the table I could hear all of the nurses and doctors just carry on with everyday conversation. It was so weird to me. There had to be a doctor and nurse for every baby and myself. I swear there was more than that though. The room was so packed with people. The nurses kept having to remind me to breath. I was in complete shock... Terrified to move my body (the parts I could move).... I was just staring at the ceiling. Was this real life? Was I really about to meet my kiddos?
Okay okay.... the babies...
They start the procedure and I couldn't feel a thing. I really didn't know what was going on because the doctors were just carrying on everyday conversation.
One of the nurses said baby A is out! I heard a healthy cry and I just started crying!! Aaah that was MY baby crying. THAT just came out of my stomach! They cleaned her up and brought her around to show me.
Next came baby B... "Just slid right out" as the doctors joked. He was ready to get out from in between his sisters. Again, I heard a healthy cry and tears streamed down my face. My boy was here!!! The nurses cleaned him up and brought him over to me as well.
Last but not least baby C was out. She cried, I cried. They brought her over to me and I was just beaming!!! Three healthy babies just came out of my belly. (I'm still trying to wrap my head around that right now.)
The doctors finished my procedure, David followed OUR kids up to the NICU and the nurses wheeled me up to my room. I was literally back in the room within like 45 mins. They were crazy fast.
Now for the kiddos all cleaned up. :)
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Once we got to the hospital the blood tests started and a 24 hr urine collection. They said they'd wait until they got the results of the blood test and urine to make any decisions. 24 hour urine started at like 2pm and they told me they probably wouldn't get the results until Tuesday evening, then they'd make a decision.
Through the night Monday my blood pressure continued to rise and my headache got worse. Tuesday morning around 10am my doctor came in and said he didn't want to wait for the urine collection, instead plan on a c-section at 2pm. I immediately called David freaking out telling him to leave work and get here.... NOW!
You have NO IDEA how nervous I was about having a c-section. I was absolutely completely terrified. I thought for sure I was going to lose too much blood and die.... That or the epidural was going to paralyze me. The thought of getting the epidural to numb me, pretty much sent me into an anxiety attack.
30 mins till go time! Here's my last belly picture folks... Not attractive. Haha!
As I laid on the hospital bed being pushed through the halls headed towards the operating room, it was like I was in a different world. David was holding my hand and my body was shaking profusely! David didn't initially go in the operating room with me. He made a stop to put on his scrubs. I was NOT HAPPY that he wasn't there as they were numbing me. I was sitting on the edge of the operating table, leaning on the nurse and really could have used his hand to hold. They laid me back on the table and David walked in... THANK GOODNESS!!!!!
Laying on the table I could hear all of the nurses and doctors just carry on with everyday conversation. It was so weird to me. There had to be a doctor and nurse for every baby and myself. I swear there was more than that though. The room was so packed with people. The nurses kept having to remind me to breath. I was in complete shock... Terrified to move my body (the parts I could move).... I was just staring at the ceiling. Was this real life? Was I really about to meet my kiddos?
Okay okay.... the babies...
Their beds are all ready!
They start the procedure and I couldn't feel a thing. I really didn't know what was going on because the doctors were just carrying on everyday conversation.
One of the nurses said baby A is out! I heard a healthy cry and I just started crying!! Aaah that was MY baby crying. THAT just came out of my stomach! They cleaned her up and brought her around to show me.
Baby A
Next came baby B... "Just slid right out" as the doctors joked. He was ready to get out from in between his sisters. Again, I heard a healthy cry and tears streamed down my face. My boy was here!!! The nurses cleaned him up and brought him over to me as well.
Baby B
Last but not least baby C was out. She cried, I cried. They brought her over to me and I was just beaming!!! Three healthy babies just came out of my belly. (I'm still trying to wrap my head around that right now.)
Baby C
My babies were here. And I was HAPPY!
The doctors finished my procedure, David followed OUR kids up to the NICU and the nurses wheeled me up to my room. I was literally back in the room within like 45 mins. They were crazy fast.
Now for the kiddos all cleaned up. :)
Aurora Leigh Link
3 pounds 12 ounces
17.50 inches long
Gavin David Link
4 pounds 9 ounces
19.25 inches long
Madelyn Mae Link
4 pounds 2 ounces
17.50 inches long
Now for the LONGEST 24 hours of my life where I was on magnesium and couldn't see my babies. I kept sending David up to the NICU to take more pictures. I just could not wait to see them again.
PS the c section was no big deal! If you're going to have one, don't stress... it'll all be just fine!
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